1. INCOMPLETE:
Studying economics at the University of California.
The problem with this sentence is that it is a gramatically incomplete phrase, not a sentence. Who is studying econonmics? There is no subject. To make is a complete sentence, indicate the subject. Example: Terrence Hopkins was studying economics at the University of California.
2. ANNOUNCEMENT:
My topic is about the current economic recession.
Never announce what your topic is. A better sentence might be: The current economic recession is the result of various factors that have been building for many years prior to 2008.
3. VAGUE:
People can be judgmental.
Judgemental about what? Be specific. Example: People can be judgmental about the physical appearance of others, especially about weight and youthful beauty.
4. INVALID POINT:
Life is less stressful today than in previous centuries.
This is not necessarily true. There are many indications today that in modern society, stress is an ever-growing problem leading to many physical and mental health issues. It also depends on what country or region one is talking about, as well as quality of life issues such as income and living conditions. A better sentence might be: For many people in low-income neighborhoods in Los Angeles, stress is a part of everyday life.
5. TOO BROAD.
Food is delicious.
All food is delicious? That depends. Be more specific. A better sentence might be: Traditional Vietnamese food can be quite delicious if prepared carefully with the right ingredients.
6. TOO NARROW:
My brother was born on January 2, 2012.
Here, the sentence is a little too specific. Where does the writer go from here? What more is there to elaborate on? A better sentence might be: My brother, who was eventually diagnosed with autism, has taught me many lessons about human interaction.
7. TOO OBVIOUS:
Hunger is not something anyone should experience.
Everyone knows this already. The writer is making a point that is already understood by any reader. A better sentence might be: Hunger around the world today is inexcusable in light of the fact that we now have excellent distribution methods and are able to produce food far greater than is actually needed.
